A Personal Science

eric mccarty
3 min readJan 27, 2021
Personal Science — Headless Now — Misty — Poetry

A personal science:

it’s a personal science, my own investigation of the world — of what appears each moment, how it all unfolds and subtle changes, and if anything remains steady through its motion. It’s about my own belonging. My experience is the focus, from each sense there comes a momentary experiment, a current happening that informs me of a certain aspect of attention.

to begin with listening, it’s the experiment of dawn, before my eyes even open — I hear the world come to me, sounds muted through my slow awakening. Everything is heard softly. My first note is of receiving, nothing is asked for, sounds arrive in early gifts. Birdsong’s singing me awake. Cars in distant travel. Yet something of me remains quiet, still, a simple listening. To this, my eyes now open.

my morning is aware.

again, the world comes to me — seeing is sudden, but gentle too in it’s arrival. Opening my eyes, and it all appears, nothing has been asked for, I am gifted dawn, a new day, and whatever may unfold. I’m seeing, and it’s all a first, cleansed of any day before, I see only what’s now given. For just a moment, that first eyelid of awakening, there are no labels, everything just is for its own sake of reason. I’m without name, no story, just seeing, aware. It’s a seamless morning, all flowing from the point of my awakening. What’s seen is the reality of light, of the sun’s reach through window, to finding my eyes, offering its touch of warmth and greeting. I wake to its display, light in soft becoming, one thing lending itself to the distinctions of the morning,

this is my awakening.

my body too wakes in new sensations, to feel a brush of air against me, the touch of sun, and stir of early hunger. In first light, there is no memory of what’s occurred before. There’s only now, awareness of the body, the feeling of a new world. It’s the direct experience of simply being, true mindfulness. The person that belongs to this body, the self that will soon claim this morning — hasn’t yet awakened. For now, for just an instant, there’s only a world of sensations.

soon though, thoughts begin to offer their opinion, I begin to label what’s familiar, and the day starts in ordinary wonder. Yet, awareness remains. That first sense of it all arriving to a new moment is my reality, always there for notice. It’s a call for a personal science, to explore the world as if I first awakened. Awareness is always available, the source which holds my day. Every moment is the same as what occurs at dawn. I wake to what is, another aspect of the world becoming. I only have to listen, to see, to feel what’s now occurring.

it’s the personal science of aware.

~
Peace,
Eric

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eric mccarty

Writer, prose poetry, meditation teacher and lifetime student