Without Need Of Explanation

Without need of:

without need of explanation — everything belongs as it does, simply and for reasons of their own appearance. Life doesn’t offer apologies, what occurs is the only ever way that things could be, and there is no real argument otherwise. Of course we will debate this, second guess ourselves and each event that seemingly turns against us. Yet no argument will ever change the past course that has led us to this moment.

it’s here, we always find ourselves.

reminding myself of this, of where I find myself right now, who I am — and it seems important to accept this moment as it’s offered, just this, no more until the next instant seamlessly arrives. There are many questions that make their way to me, doubts, and even blame. I find myself wishing to have been a better caretaker, a more caring son, and at least another thousand thoughts rush to lay their claim of guilt and fault. This is where I find myself, here, and no escape.

and of course there’s no other possible place to be, the course of life and apparent choices have brought me to this moment. I meet it all directly, without need of explanations. To properly grieve has little to do with acceptance of the past, nor mourning a future that will not include what’s now gone. That’s all a process that always, and can only, leave me here, alone with the company…